Elite Beat Agents.
Because there aren't enough games that let you rock out for the good of humanity.
By: Tom Chick
Posted: 8 Nov 2006
As far as rhythm games go, Elite Beat Agents is one of the best. This English language version of Nintendo's deliriously goofy Osu! Tatake! Ouendan is a must have for the DS. It's perfectly suited for the platform, it's got a good variety of songs, and it's weirdly different enough that you've got to see it to appreciate it.
The basic idea is that you're using the touchscreen to pop little balloons in time with a song while a branching movie plays on the top screen. If you do well, the movie will go through its good branches. If you do poorly, the movie will go through its bad branches. These movies are mostly entertaining nonsense, part anime, part music video, part nods to pop culture. Sometimes they relate to the song. "Material Girl", for instance, is about a pair of moneyed divas a la Nicole Richie and Paris Hilton stranded on a desert island.
But mostly, the movies are as irrelevant as music videos. David Bowie's well-known "Let's Dance" shows a Texas millionaire drilling for oil. Chicago's maudlin "You're the Inspiration" is a weirdly creepy story about a little girl wishing her dead father would bring her a Christmas gift. Ashlee Simpson's spirited "La La" features a nurse and a devil, representing the immune system and a virus, battling it out inside someone's body. The unifying factor is that they all feature the eponymous agents saving the day, and eventually coming together to save the world. Yes, it's as random as it sounds.
The rhythm game is mostly tapping on colored numbers that string out along the screen. Sometimes you'll have to slide the cursor, and there are occasionally wheels you spin for bonus points. It sounds deceptively simple, but like any good rhythm game, it folds very nicely into the beats of any given song. As you play, you'll get better. And you'll eventually reach a point where you're "in the zone", tapping along with a song and every bit as involved as if you were playing Guitar Hero or Rez.
Overall, it's a good song list. Most folks will like some songs, hate others, and be indifferent to the rest. But the point is that there's something here for everyone. It's too bad the DS's tinny little speakers don't do the music justice. Even with headphones, the sound quality is pretty mushy. None of the songs are original recordings, which is pretty disappointing. Most of the sound-alikes are passable, but in some songs, they didn't even bother to try. Are Mick Jagger and Madonna simply too well known?
Props to Nintendo for nifty multiplayer support, which isn't just a competitive mode in which you're trying to outscore your opponent (complete with unique visuals that serve as different "arenas"). You can also play cooperatively with someone who owns a copy of the game, or you can play a downloadable version with someone who doesn't own the game.
The main screen is pretty unwieldy. You have to scroll around a bunch of locations to look for the song you want. A simple list would have been much easier to navigate. And it's odd that a song's original performer isn't listed. But that's what the internet is for: looking up stuff like who sings that catchy "Walkie Talkie Man".
On the easiest level, you can knock out all the game's songs in an evening. But then you'll see how gratifying it is to do the same song on a harder level. At that point, Elite Beat Agents pretty much has you. Before you know it, you've spend an hour of "just one more try" to get past a single song. And once you've mastered it, what do you know?, you probably even like that song now. Because that's the mark of a good rhythm game: it makes you like songs you wouldn't otherwise like. Anyone for some Ashlee Simpson or Avril Lavigne?
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